My Life in Azerbaijan - Life after Peace Corps

July 29, 2010
The world renowned Chinese architect I.M. Pei is a friend of my friend. I am always proud to have that remote connection with him, no matter how vague that association is. The first time when I learned about him, I like him immediately. Mr. Pei and I actually share a lot of things in common.

First, we are Chinese, grew up in HongKong, educated in and immigrated to America, had a career in New York and most of all, we both have the deepest passion for nature, we love plants; sensitivity that we were lucky to have. Because of that, we see and feel things around us differently from most people, we are passionate to do things that we believe in and vigorously pursuit our dreams without considering cost. I found myself liking him as if he is a grandfather I never had.

Two days ago, I saw him on TV again. 93 years old, he is still very alert; his mind is as sharp as a young man. When was asked what his greatest fulfillment was, surprisingly it was none of those well-recognized architectural designs he built. He simply answered that it was his family where he found happiness and contentment. His answer awakens me. I have pondered about my life after Peace Corps for quite sometimes. Staying in Azerbaijan, take the bank’s job offer or returning to New York, go back to the pressure lifestyle once more, I could not decide. Today, Mr. Pei’s answer has given me some ideas.

I ran away from home since I was a young girl, I was profoundly upset by the inequitable treatment between a son and a daughter in a traditional Chinese family. My elder sister is the only person I miss back home. I have left her to face the unfair treatment alone for a long time. Thinking about her often brings tears to my eyes. I spent most of life in America, have accomplished many dreams. Although my biggest dream which I have been chasing after for 18 years, has not yet become a reality. Considering all the effort and love I have put in to foster that dream, yet I have no regret for letting that dream die, I have done my best. After all, we cannot have everything in life, can we?

Lately I have been longing to go home, like the weeping willow tree, the taller it grows, the more its branches touch its roots. My root is in HongKong, where my sister and I will care for each other, where as Mr. Pei said, I will find happiness and contentment.

My Life in Azerbaijan - Watermelon, I made a bargain!

July 20, 2010
Watermelon is in season now. In front of every vegetable stand, there are piles of watermelon on display. They are very cheap, about 0.3 manat per kilo (13 cent per lb) and they are sweet and juicy. In a hot summer night, eating a slide of chill and succulent watermelon is like drinking an ice cold beer. As a woman, I am not allowed to purchase beer in this country, so I settle with a slide of watermelon every night.

Yesterday during my routine walk, I passed by a vegetable stand attending by a group of children between age 7-12. They are very cute, helping their father to sell melon. As soon as they saw me they started to cheer and say “salam”. By now, members of my community become accustomed to my present. They see me walk by their neighborhood everyday; shop owners, street vendors, teahouse customers, butchers, chefs from nearby restaurant and children from the playground, all come out and wave with a “salam”, even the homeless dog would wag his tail and bark at me. I do feel like a movie star sometimes. This group of kids tried to sell me their watermelon. I told them I only had 1 manat (US$1.25) and could not afford to buy a big one.

“Problem yoxdur” (no problem)

They said and then pointed to a rotten melon on the floor and laughed. I pretended getting mad and started to walk away. Then, the elder kid pulled me back and picked a small one for me. He weighted it on the scale and said it was 1 manat. I did not believe him because I saw the scale register as 0.98 manat. So I pretended to get mad again. Of course, they laughed and giggled and discussed among themselves for a few seconds. Finally, they picked a bigger one which weighted more than 4.0 kilo. They wanted 1.2 manats for it.

“Mənim bir manatim var” ( I only have 1 manat!)
“yaxşı yaxşı” (ok, ok)

One of the boys took my manta and gave me a big grin; showing his missing front tooth. (He is really a cute boy) As soon as I turned around with my melon, I could hear more laughs, giggles, and whispers. I was afraid they sold me a bad melon, so I turned around and asked them again,

“Pisdir?: (bad melon??)
“Yox, yox! (No, No!)

Slowly I walked away, still hearing more laughs, giggles and whispers behind me. I should be the one laughing, thinking that I made a bargain, but I do feel guilty taking advantage of those innocent boys.

My Life in Azerbaijan - Appearance

July 18, 2010
Appearance is everything for the Azeri people. They are obsessed by keeping their shoes spotless clean even in a rainy day with mud everywhere and they care very much how their hair look. Azerbaijan must have the highest concentration of hair saloons in the world. I count my street, it has eight hair saloons! They must also iron all their clothes! I receive Peace Corps monthly newsletter today, and I have to laugh. One section is written to remind us the importance of bringing a napkins/rag with us on a muddy day so we can clean our shoes!

However, if you go to the Azeri home and look at their toilet, it will make you sick. The urine smell never seemed to bother them, the dirt on the floor, the leaking pipes, the broken toilet seat (if it has one, usually it doesn’t), the un-flushable toilet bowl, the filth on the wall, the insects, the oxidized showerhead, etc., are all acceptable conditions to them. My previous host family has a western type toilet; it is brand new, clean but only for display. When they have to do their “dirty” business, everyone use the “shit hole” outside the house. That “shit hole” is covered with yellow stains, permeated by smelly odor and the place has no light. At night, they just bring a flesh light with them. I can never understand it.

I agree with Vivian’s comment about the importance of our “nest”, a home where it gives me comfort, privacy, shelter, and a place where occasionally we can escape from the outside world. For that reason, I try my best to keep my apartment clean. However, keeping my Azerbaijan bathroom clean and fresh has been a challenge to me. No matter how much I clean, bleach and scrub, it can never smell as fresh as my bathroom in New York. The problem is due to the old and leaky pipes up stair of my neighbor. Instead of fixing those leaky pipes and getting ride of the odor, my landlord simply covers the ceiling with an artificial ceiling. It is just a matter of time when those pipes eventually burst and the entire ceiling collapses and my bathroom becomes one big “shit hole”. I hope that day will not come until next year December, or I have to take an ET (early termination). Other than this, my life in Azerbaijan is fine.

My Life in Azerbaijan - Heat, the unbearable heat!

July 15, 2010
Finally it rained last night! Perhaps the monsoon rain from India at last reaches Azerbaijan or maybe it is the Khazri wind arrives from the north, it brings us the most needed rain and also the desired coolness to this town, so we have a piece of the pleasure, a total relief from the tormenting heat.

Rain does not come often in my town, especially during summer. Azerbaijan normally receives 300 days of sunshine and it is the absolute true. Summer in Baku and my town is appallingly hot. Average temperature is well above 35C or 97F. It is so hot in the afternoon that you can find every one hiding under a tree, or drinking çay (hot tea) in a teahouse.

Teahouse is a byproduct of this heat, it is kind of like the coffee shop in America, except in America, the shop serves cold drinks, but the teahouse here serves hot tea. Occasionally, it does serve cold beer but rare. Another exception is: no woman is allowed to enter into a teahouse. It is the gender issue. Imagine I purchase a cold beer and sit in a teahouse alone; it will be a BIG news in town! It is definitely an OLMAZ! (forbidden!) By now, I have learnt to live with it and not be bothered by it.

In New York, we have hot weather as well, but I am not normally troubled by it since AC is everywhere. The luxury thing that I took it for granted is not so accessible here. As a result, I do suffer occasionally. Fortunately I live alone, so I wear as little as possible in my apartment. Frequent cold shower often helps.

The experience however, humbles me. As a New Yorker, I inherit the typical “cocky and arrogant” habits and sometimes they do sneak up on me unconsciously. Every so often I lost my “cool” when I was confined inside a minibus with 100 degree temperature and with no AC. The locals, in contrast, simply sat quietly and patiently for the bus to leave the terminal.

The rain stops when I head out to work. It is a pleasure walk with a cool breeze. Nature once again provides the best remedy. I shall live….

My Life in Azerbaijan - Commitment

July 14, 2010

“There are two rules in life:
never count the cost &
never do anything unless you can do it wholeheartedly….”

I believe in this immensely! It is all about commitment. When we agree to perform a task, how dedicated we are to get the job done. When we consent to exchange a vow, how devoted we are to keep those words alive. Much to my surprise, nowadays there are not many people truly recognize the important of a commitment, or appreciate the essence of a pledge. Seeing the increasing ET (early termination) rate of AZ7 and also hearing distressed news about our love one back home breaking promise with us, I can not help but falling into despair. Are we all losing our value?

The giant pines outside my apartment window are radiant in the evening glow. The sun is sinking behind a saffron cloud. An elderly couple with their hands clinging to each other slowly walks towards the sunset.......

My Life in Azerbaijan - A Job Offer

July 6, 2010
Last week, the director of HR of my organization in Baku called. She told me that the Vice Chairman (my counterpart) would like to talk to me. Right away I thought I was in trouble. After all, these past few months I have been sending him lots of e-mails asking questions and pointing out misstatements of the organization’s financials. He never answered any of my questions, I got a little bit frustrated so I sent him one last e-mail two weeks ago telling him “There are just too many mistakes, we need to talk!” Maybe he fed up with my attitude and wanted me to back off. Well, he cannot fire me, I am a volunteer! Expecting the worse, I went to his office.

He was later 45 minutes, but by now I am used to the “Punctuality Habit” of the locals. Finally he was ready to see me. The director of HR accompanied me to the meeting. I was wondering “WHY? Am I really in such a big trouble?” I met the Vice Chairman before. He is actually a gentleman. He apologized for being late, and after that he began to talk.

“Do you miss America Chi?”
“Of course”
“Do you like Sumgayit?”
“Yes, everyone in the branch is very kind to me”
“Living in Baku is better, lots of theater, shop, do you like Baku?”
“Yes, sure”
“What is your plan after Peace Corps?”
“I am planning to visit HK, see my family, travel and…”
“No no, I do not mean that, what is your future plan?”
“Oh, I need to find a job”

(Silence for a few seconds) He then looked at the director of HR first, then me and smiled,

“Well, our organization is going through restructuring, we can certainly utilize your skills to help us. It will be a senior level position. Do you think you will stay in Azerbaijan after Peace Corps?”

He really caught me off guard. I did not know what to say but I had to admit, I was flattered.

“Well, I haven’t thought about it…. but it is possible”
“You don’t want to leave Peace Corps right now, do you?”

Wow, is he asking me to quit Peace Corps. Immediately, my reaction is “NO”.

“I come to your country to help, not for my own personal interest”

I politely explained to him. He was a bit embarrassed, and then he continued,

“Are you willing to move to Baku and work in the HQ, we will subsidize your apartment, maybe after you finish Peace Corps, you will continue to work for us?”

At this point, I felt like floating in the air, feeling pretty good. This man was offering me a job, not just a job, a high level position job! but then I thought about “J”, my apartment, my friends in New York, NY China town, Utah, hiking, backpacking and….

“I need to discuss this with Peace Corps, please give me a week to think it over”

I left his office. On my way home, I kept thinking about his offer. The job market in the US now is very bad, when I finish my service with Peace Corps, I may not be able to find a job at once. Here in Baku, I am certain to have a job, this is truly a wonderful thing happening to me, but why am I not feeling so excited?

To be continued.

My Life in Azerbaijan - Meeting Hillary Clinton

July 4, 2010
Only a handful of PCVs were invited to the July 4 event in the US Embassy. The main highlight of the event is the visit of Mrs. Clinton, Secretary of the States. When Mark called and told me that my name was on the list, I was very excited and looking forward to meeting her. The true highlight of the day for me, however, was meeting Linda and Denny, the lovely AZ6 couple whom I was so eager to meet since I arrived in Azerbaijan. Denny and Linda gave me a lot of helpful information last year when I was preparing to leave for Azerbaijan. They are indeed a charming, kind, and gentle couple.

This is the first time I visited the US Embassy in Baku. The compound is located in a not so nice neighborhood but has a lovely garden. Nevertheless, from the garden, you can see Azeri laundries everywhere, due to the fact that the compound is surrounded by apartment buildings. The locals are not shy to displace their underwear. It is kind of embarrassed to have a conversation with Mrs. Clinton while the Azeri colorful “flags” are everywhere. No wonder Mrs. Clinton was telling us that the Embassy was seeking a better place to move.

The US Government only fed us ice cream and cold drinks. No BBQ, no hotdog, not even some chips and cookies. There were not a lot of American attending the event, only the US Embassy faculties with their families, people from the Peace Corps office and less than 10 Peace Corps Volunteers. It was a very hot day and the event was held outdoor, so Mrs. Clinton did not linger too long. She looked tired, after 5 minutes speech and hang around for another 5 minutes, she left for the airport. I did not even get a chance to shake her hand not to mention a photo! The rest of the day was uneventful, except when I requested a bathroom stop, a security personnel had to escort me inside the compound, waited outside the lady room until I finished.

It was not an exciting day as I was expected but I got a story to tell when I return to the States!